{"id":4962,"date":"2006-05-04T09:00:56","date_gmt":"2006-05-04T09:00:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/?p=4962"},"modified":"2011-05-14T21:59:56","modified_gmt":"2011-05-14T21:59:56","slug":"the-secret-thoughts-of-a-maryland-school-of-public-policy-prof","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/?p=4962","title":{"rendered":"The secret thoughts of a Maryland School of Public Policy prof"},"content":{"rendered":"

No wonk has ever won a vote, yet we’re the ones who rule.
\nFor us, the whole of Washington’s become a kind of school.
\nThe politicos are our students; they show up from the sticks
\nWith shiny smiles, fancy suits, and campaign-finance tricks.
\nBut when we talk cost\/benefit, chi-squared, or Freddie Mac,
\nTheir brains feel slow, their spirits, low; their mouths look kinda slack.
\n“You profs,” they drawl, “it seems y’all know exactly what to do.
\nYou<\/em> write the bill, just as you will, and tell us when you’re through.”
\nIn College Park, we’ve students, too; they’re the ones who pay us.
\nBut they don’t exactly have the clout to make us into playahs.
\nThat’s why we love the World Bank, C-SPAN, or a think tank,
\nAnywhere that cameras roll and the offices are swank.
\nCivic engagement? Sounds like a drag.
\nPublic deliberation? Don’t make me gag.
\nA populist revolt? Not in our time.
\nThe people only care about celebrities and crime.
\nYouth are dumb and selfish, but that’s really no surprise.
\nTheir parents can’t detect the most patronizing lies.
\nVoting’s overrated: I’ve<\/em> hardly ever done it.
\nAs for the government, who’d really want to run it?
\nAnd while I’m getting all of this off my panting chest,
\nWhat about the folks who think that Maryland’s the best?
\nPlease, a Terp is a turtle with his head up in his … shell.
\nAgainst a Blue Devil, he’s got a snowball’s chance in hell.
\nThe Terps are meek, the ozone’s weak, our troops are up a creek.
\nPhilosophy’s obsolescent and the future’s looking bleak.
\nNet intelligence is constant, but the population keeps on growing.
\nWe’re out of cash, ideas, and friends, but the mess is still ongoing.
\nThe end is near, I sadly fear, for planet, country, school.
\nBut I get paid for opinions, so my future’s looking cool!<\/small><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

No wonk has ever won a vote, yet we’re the ones who rule. For us, the whole of Washington’s become a kind of school. The politicos are our students; they show up from the sticks With shiny smiles, fancy suits, and campaign-finance tricks. But when we talk cost\/benefit, chi-squared, or Freddie Mac, Their brains feel […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[19,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4962","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-academia","category-verse-and-worse"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4962","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4962"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4962\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6190,"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4962\/revisions\/6190"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4962"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4962"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peterlevine.ws\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4962"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}